Well, this is a new day for me. I know that the Lord has been working on my heart for weeks now. I am getting closer to bringing this chapter to a close and my quest for health is becoming a reality that I can almost touch and feel inside me. No, the outside is not there yet, but it is coming. It starts within first. This will be for me and no one else. I have been so busy in my life trying to make me better for everyone else..you know the people I am talking about...the ones that only accept the "outside" appearance of others. They are shallow people and have their own demons they need to deal with. I will no longer put myself to the back burner. I was believing the lies of "I am not good enough". What a crock!
This week has been a week of revelations. I know that I cannot continue with the same behaviors and expect different results. I must make different choices if I want to succeed in my quest for health. This is NOT about losing weight. It is about loving myself, getting healthy, and being able to serve the Lord on this earth until He calls me home. I am exhausted of having to deal with everyone else's opinion of me and my weight.
My BFF said something to me today that really hit home. She told me that each time I did the fast and tried/did lose weight I was doing it for everyone else. Always thinking my family would only accept me as my thinner self. What a crock that was then and is now! Thin or fat, my family was always judging me, trying to control me, not wanting to hear the truth of our past. I was always trying to fix the "outside" and the "inside" was not there yet with the healing. The healing of the wounds have progressed and are no longer bleeding, no longer gaping wounds but a few scabs and the skin is closed and healing. This is my time!
This woman and I are very connected and are soul sisters. She also said that I am not the same person I was when I did the fasting programs where I lost over 100 pounds each time. I don't think the same, I don't approach life the same. This time it needs to be for me. I am so grateful that I have genuine people in my life that love me for who I am today, yesterday and will love me tomorrow. They don't see my weight. They see ME! The person I am and the person they love. I love my sisterhood of friends! I don't know where I would be without them. When she told me to start this blog in December 2008 she told me to make this about me and no one else. That is what I share on here so that I can perhaps help others through my journey into health so that they too can know how important they are to God and their purpose on this earth.
I see myself thin and healthy. .JPG)
That is the picture you see and that is the person I am inside. I will see this woman again in real life and in the mirror. I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me! I am fearfully and wonderfully made and my Heavenly Father loves me now, then, and forever!
Today I thought I would write about the lies we believe. We listen to these lies from others and the lies take root and they grow and grow and grow. Pretty soon, these lies become our truth. It takes God, His Word, His Love for us to start digging at the roots and only in His Love and Strength we can rip the roots out. The funny thing about roots. If you are a gardener or have worked in a garden, you know that there are roots attached to roots and they spread. Some are very thick, and some are very small. However, we must look at these lies as we see the roots of a plant. There is one main root, but many roots that are part of the main one. That is why it takes hard work and determination to eradicate the roots of a lie. All the "little roots" are lies too. Some may not be as noticeable but they are there. God says we are to walk in love. We must remember, that we must walk in love with ourselves as well. Love never fails. We are Daughters of the Most High God. 
We are loved and looked upon as precious creatures in His Sight. When we are in pain from one of the roots of lies, it is God wanting to rip that root out. But you cannot change what you do not acknowledge. How many times are we going to go around the same mountain? It is time to stop and bust through the mountain of lies. But only with God can we do this. We cannot do this alone. And sometimes we must do this with a trusted therapist/counselor that is trained in the trauma of ripping out the roots and dealing with the pain to get past it. There is healing in God. A lot of people think that they only need God and don't need therapy. That if you are in therapy you are weak. This is yet another lie that Satan and his minions use to keep us captive in the lies and the pain. Satan doesn't want to see us go through the pain as he knows once we go through it we will be free from it. He knows that when we start to rip out the roots of his lies it is so over for him. We will be able to live our life in freedom and in love. So why not take back our life and say to H-E-L-L with Satan and look up at the Freedom God has for us. Let us not look in the mirror and see our flaws, let others' judgements or opinions of us matter. God sees us as precious loving women. Let us see ourselves through His eyes and His eyes only. God wants the best for us to be blessed and filled with His love. Do that today. Let yourself be filled with God's love and let Him very gently start to rip out the roots of lies within. 
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